Chronic illness can bring many things, but one most people don’t think about is medical trauma. Just because you haven’t experienced a war zone, attacker, or sudden car crash doesn’t mean you haven’t experienced trauma. Trauma comes in many forms, and one that is getting more recognition as of late is medical trauma. Trauma as a whole can be defined as any event that evokes extreme helplessness. These helpless events have been shown to trigger the same pathways in the brain as war and abuse. Many people with chronic illness have experienced some sort of trauma related to medical care, and an estimated 25% of those with a chronic illness will develop medically-induced PTSD.
For those with IBD in particular an estimated 32% will experience post-traumatic stress symptoms related to medical care. The main difference between trauma and medical trauma, or illness-induced PTSD, is that medical trauma comes from within. Things like war and abuse come from outside yourself, while a chronic illness comes from within yourself. When you can’t rely on your body to keep you well, and there is no fixed end point for your illness you feel that you are an ongoing internal threat which can be very traumatizing to the psyche. This illness-induced PTSD comes from a chronic illness, but can be catalyzed by any care that you perceive to be traumatic. Maybe a bad blood draw, IV hookup, botched procedure, or uncontrollable pain while hospitalized. Whatever it is, when you put yourself near your triggers like, needles, hospitals, or doctor offices you may notice a physical reaction. Sweating, shaking, dizziness, rapid heart rate, and nausea may occur.
Like other forms of PTSD, illness-induced also has symptoms encompassing trouble sleeping, irritability, flashbacks, and avoidance. These perceived dangers we have experienced will likely re-emerge as they have something to do with our ongoing care for our chronic illness. Our trauma can also come from medical gaslighting. Unfortunately, sometimes doctors may not validate our symptoms or take us seriously which leads patients to feel that it’s all in their heads. This can also cause trauma of its own and make patients less likely to seek medical care in the future. This can be detrimental to the patient’s mental health, as many with medical trauma develop anxiety or depression that needs to be treated.
I personally have IBD and have also experienced medically-induced trauma. Even before my diagnosis I had always hated blood draws and needles, after having a bad blood draw as a young girl. After learning I would have to start an intravenous biologic while being hospitalized for a severe UC flare, I remember thinking I have no idea how I’m going to get blood drawn and get hooked up to an IV every few weeks. The first year of infusions were rough. Every time they tried to poke me, I cried uncontrollably, and my body went into sheer panic mode. I would become extremely hot, nauseous, and almost pass out every time. After braving it on my own for that year, I finally had a conversation with my GI doctor about my difficulty. He then prescribed an anti-anxiety medication for me to take before my infusions. This helped a ton! I also sought out therapeutic help to sort through this physiological reaction to medical care. I wish I would have done these so much sooner!
Once you can begin to explore and understand your trauma you can start to recognize what causes them and how you can get through them. Anything that increases your sense of safety can help immensely. As you start to feel the anxious feelings coming up you can ask yourself am I safe? Most of the time the answer will be yes. Verbalizing and reassuring yourself of this will lower your body’s anxious response. Finding things that help you feel grounded like breathwork and meditation can help as well. If you are struggling with illness-induced trauma like I was, I encourage you to speak up about your symptoms and find a solution that works for you. Addressing the root cause of the problem is always the best way to go, giving you the most freedom to separate your trauma from yourself.
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